Yuk - The Swine!
Isnt it fun now that the Swine Flu is back ably supported by the Noro Virus (thats the one where you explode from both ends). There was a girl on the tube today, headphones on, sniffling and snuffling from her red nose, reading the paper, well i say reading it but she wasn't, she was looking at the pics as she ripped through it. She needed to turn the pages so quickly so she was LICKING HER FINGERS for sticky friction to turn the pages eeeewww. I looked at her with disgust and she saw me looking. I think she got the wrong idea, as instead of stopping the disgusting schnuffling and licking she got her mirror and make-up out.
Later as I was walking up a platform I did let out a sneeze. I covered my mouth and tried to lessen the blast but out it came in a loud YAHOOOOO. A woman with lank , unbrushed grey hair looked at me like I was the monster from the black lagoon so I walked up and asked her if sneezing was illegal. She almost ran off in terror.
Finally I saw a superb sight. A bloke that was bald until the mid point of his head whereby he had an almost quiff like bush of hair on the back 3rd. Like a Jedward but with a beach of pink shiny flesh leading up to the hair bit. I sneaked a pic but cant really post it as that would be too cruel even for me.